Sometimes - CloudxTifa

The rain was parading down in sheets, striking Tifa's bedroom window in the back of the bar "Seventh Heaven", with a strong brutality and outrage. Although in sleep and unaware of such a storm, Tifa stirred mildly in the damp cold that radiated from the walls.

Shivering, Tifa was startled into reality by the sensation and thought that she had heard somebody laughing. She sat up in bed, fretting as the cold, spring rain continuously clacked against the window like watery little bullets. She glanced around her dark room, taking in sharp yet quiet breaths, trying to concentrate on hearing the ominous giggle again. It came again, only louder regardless of the rainstorm. It came from outdoors, and in Tifa's mindframe it sounded suspiciously like Marlene.

Throwing the thick covers off her bed, Tifa removed her pajamas and got dressed with the clothes she had been wearing before she got into bed in the first place, and started towards the bar, still groggy.

The whole bar was empty, and it was four o'clock in the morning. Enraged, she thought about all the things in the world that would cause Marlene to go outside this hour in the morning. 'There could have been an animal outside, or maybe she left one of her toys...' Her thoughts trailed as she pulled on a long coat and flicked up the hood over her long hair. She continued to let this list of possible reasons grow, as she made her way out the door and started to look around. 'Maybe Denzel dared her to do something, or...'

However, as Tifa rounded the corner of the large building to see the back, a few of her questions recruited answers from what she observed. Yes, Marlene was outside. So was Denzel. And, the reason why, was simply Cloud Strife.

If I was a simple man,
Would we still walk hand in hand?
And if I suddenly went blind,
Would you still look in my eyes?

The scene played out in front of her like a scene in a movie that would cause her lips to curve into a smile and would warm her heart. However, she wasn't smiling and her heart felt rather cold. Denzel and Marlene were joined by their small hands, spinning in circles around Cloud's standing, motionless body. The rain poured all around them like a monsoon, as their child like, joyful laughter rang around the Seventh Heaven property like a loud bell. She couldn't tell if Cloud was smiling or not from her length away from the trio, and she approached closer.

"Marlene, Denzel! What are you doing?! It's four in the morning..." She let her voice trail, as the two orphans she loved dearly, stopped their spinning circle of rejoice and stared at her apologetically. "You can get sick out here in all this cold rain, " She continued, crossing her arms as she scolded them firmly. "And I was getting worried, you know how Midgar is these days. Denzel, you should be--"

"C'mon, Tifa. Don't be so mad with them," Cloud sympathized, walking a little closer to the girl with the dark hair and solemn eyes, and placing one of his friendly looking hands on each of the orphan's shoulders. "It's kind of my fault, anyway. They must have heard me pull in, because I wasn't even inside before I saw them running to see me." Tifa could understand this easily. Simply because Cloud had been gone for nearly a week on delivery business, and the kids had been anxious to see him again since the first minute of his absence.

Tifa crossed her arms, feeling a little irritated with Cloud's desicion to defend the kids in such a situation. However, she realized there wasn't much of a point in yelling and lecturing them at four in the morning; she was sure that everyone would be more pleased with just going back to bed. "Alright. Just, don't do it again, alright? At least not without letting me know first?"

"Okay, sorry, Tifa." Denzel apologized, with a sincere smile on his young face.

Marlene nodded, "Sorry." She stated, wiping some rainwater off of her arms and seeming to shiver a little.

Cloud ruffled Denzel's hair and leaned down to kiss Marlene on the top of her head. Then he gave them gentle shoves, just enough to get them walking back to the bar, their bedrooms, and ultimatly to the rest they were losing. "Go back to bed you two. Don't let me catch you up after this."

He watched the orphans dash off through the pouring rain, until they turned the corner and disappeared from the sight of his icy teal eyes. He turned his vision to Tifa, expecting a little to be told off. Expecting to be yelled at, or at the very least to recieve a glare his way. However, she was smiling, and he was unsure why.

What happens when I grow old,
And all my stories have been told?

"Glad to see you home, Cloud." Tifa said, taking a few steps toward him. By now the hood of her long jacket had been blown down by the wind's savage attitude, as she watched him, waiting for an answer.

Cloud's hair seemed darker in color and was messed around by the rain and wind. His eyes were just as quiet as always, a whisper inside a raging storm. He stood still without saying a word, until the wind died down and they stood in close to complete silence. "...I'm glad to be home." Cloud replied, shuffling a little in his heavy boots.

Hoping that Cloud truly was happy to be home, she turned and started walking back where she came. She thought more sleep would do her well, but as she glanced back to see if Cloud was following her lead, it discouraged her to notice he was walking in the opposite direction. Sighing and starting to let frustration get the better of her, Tifa let her voice ring out through the rain. "Cloud! Where are you going? It's four in the morning!"

"I thought I might take a walk." Tifa thought he might have said, unsure as the rain drowned his voice like loud thunder, on the roof and all around on their earth. Her feet pounded across the ground, through all the puddles until she got to him.

"Did you just say you were taking a walk? At this hour? In this weather?" Tifa demanded, her soft eyes hardening as the wind whipped around them. Her hair flailed in it's savage rage, as she stared at the back of Cloud's head, waiting for him to turn around.

"Well, yeah, I did...I like rain. A lot. You of anybody should know that." Cloud finally turned himself around to face his childhood friend, and there was a hint of a smile playing on his lips. Something rare like an endangered animal. "...Besides, it'll be like old times. We used to always go out in the rain, when we were kids."

Memories were recalled to Tifa's head like a rush of warm water. She remembered how good those times were. The innocence of friendship and childhood, and how easy everything had been...Bitterly wishing the world was still simple and attractive and normal, Tifa couldn't hold back her smile any longer. It broke through her vice grips of tiredness and aggrevation, and she avoided Cloud's eyes a little. "So, where do you suppose we walk, exactly?"

Will your heart still race for me,
Or will it march to a new beat?
If I was a simple man..

"Just around town a little I guess." Cloud stated. "Or, what's left of town, at least.." His voice was suddenly grim and and tight, and it was evident and obvious to Tifa that he was silently grieving over the beautiful world that had been reduced to a wasteland. "I'll go lock up the doors in the bar and let Denzel know where we're going."

Cloud headed towards the bar, and Tifa watched him become removed from her sight. She stood in the slowly dying rain, looking at the ruins all around her like a wilted rose. Sometimes she wished that Cloud would open up more. Not just say ominous and mysterious comments every now and again, that only mildly depicted how he felt. His feelings were shrouded behind a think mindfield of black mist; it seemed no matter how she went about her journey through this mist to see what lay beyond, she would get lost in the barrier that was guarding his feelings, and end up right where she had begun. Shut out. Most of the time she just avoided his tendancy to keep to himself, and went on with her life. But, not knowing how he  truly felt about the world, Marlene and Denzel, his job...and evenher, caused her to wonder what kind of cold, blue depth, much like the ocean, that she was missing out so boldly on.

Tifa was lost in the forest of thoughts in her head, turning only to find herself in deeper. The almost cold hand that fell on her shoulder caused her to nearly jump out of her skin; send her soaring into the pale of the cloudy, early morning skies.

Cloud jumped back a little, noticing he startled her and in turn, startled himself. Wide eyed, the blonde gave her a skeptical look and sighed. "..Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine..Sorry, just a little lost in thought."

Cloud eyed her a little, and started towards the road. "Well, let's go. It's kinda late, we shouldn't be out too long." The mysterious man that Tifa had known close to her entire life started walking away from her, and she followed reluctantly, happy to get the opportunity to spend some alone time with him. Generally, she was a full time Mother figure for the two orphans, as well as working in and owning Seventh Heaven. Her and Cloud didn't get much time where they could spend time with just eachother, whether it be mid afternoon, evening, night, morning...

She could hear birds innocently chirping in the still of the morning, and although she didn't understand what reason they had to be singing so cheerfully, she enjoyed their quiet gesture of love and happiness none-the-less. "Cloud?" She asked randomly, staring straight ahead as she walked.

"Yeah..?"

"What do you think would have happened if...if Aerith didn't..." Tifa didn't have to finish her sentance; Cloud knew exactly what she was slowly getting at. He didn't like thinking about it, but he knew well what she was speaking of. He swallowed.

If I was a simple man,
I'd own no home, I'd own no land.
Would you still stand by my side?
And would our flame still burn so bright?

"Well.." He began to answer, his words feeling like cement coming through his lips. It was hard to force the words out easily, almost like it pained his throat to explain to Tifa what he thought would have happened. Feeling like someone was strangling him with large, strong and capable hands, Cloud continued to walk straight ahead, feeling disdraught and not replying to Tifa's strange and spontanious question.

"..Cloud?"

Still not responsive, Cloud looked beside him to see that Tifa had fallen behind; stopping her strolling beside him. He looked back to see her standing some way behind himself, the wind releasing a deafening howl that sounded like a thousand tortured souls. "..Yeah?"

Neither of the pair said much for passing minutes. Different thoughts ran through very different minds like dangerous highways. Cloud wondered deeply about what was running through Tifa's head; was she thinking about the past, the future, the present...or his biggest fear of all, the "what if" 's that were endless in the minds of mere mortals such as themselves. Tifa wondered still what fueled Cloud's negative being; his thoughts and emotions. What he thought of her, and what he had thought of Aerith. Questions filled her brain like hot air fills a hot air balloon, and both waited for the other to speak, with no intentions of saying the first conversation-engaging word themselves.

Cloud took several steps towards the woman he lived with, and stopped directly in front of her. He still wondered what relevance her question had, and he could easily see that she was still waiting for an answer. He swallowed hard again, and ran a hand through his rain showered locks of spikey blonde hair. Cloud avoided Tifa's sternly curious eyes, until she yet again spoke.

"You probably would have started over your new life with her, wouldn't you?" Tifa let another question fly from her lips, like torpedos that would leave a shocking impact on Cloud and their relationship.

Her eyes were tough to look into, but Cloud forced himself. They were hard like rock, rough like the ocean. The waves of water that were dark purple, grey and black, all the colors of the dark side of the moon, that beat the shore relentlessly all the time. Never stopping for even a breath. Tifa's eyes seemed to resemble the ocean, deep and full of feeling and wonder; and most of all, relentless and determind. Determind to get something out of washing against that shore, whether it be postive or deeply negative.

Sometimes, I wonder why,
I'm so full of these endless rymes,
About the way I feel inside.
I wish I could just get it right.

Surprised by Tifa's sudden question that stung him like a deep, salted wound, Cloud sighed. "No, that wasn't what I was going to say. If you'd just let me - "

"If Sephiroth hadn't...If that hadn't happened, I probably wouldn't even be in the picture. Aerith would have taken my place, wouldn't she?" Cloud could see her expression, like a glowing ember, beginning to light up with mild rage. Feeling worried, flush and faint, Cloud fought away a headache with the better part of him, and grasped Tifa's hand into his own.

"How long have you been waiting to get that off your chest?" Cloud spoke softly in the sick weather that was beginning to pick up once again. The rain fell in heavier sheets, cold like angel's tears. "...Tifa, you would be in the picture no matter what. I hate you jumping to conclusions, just because I didn't answer right away. I had to think about what you asked for a second, it's a really hard, and well...Strange question for me to answer."

Tifa let her eyes fall to her feet and the muddy ground they stood upon. "Sorry, Cloud. I just...I don't know where I'll be tomorrow. This world is unpredictable almost all the time, and just..." She let her voice trail away from her lips, and she plucked her eyes from the earth and let them dive back into Cloud's freezing, yet compassionate, frost colored ones.

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Cloud turned towards their original destination. "Let's keep walking.." As they both started forward again, Tifa was surprised that Cloud's hand didn't fall limp and release hers like usual; as if it belonged to a corpse rather than a strong and extremely capable young man. Instead he held it firmly, and it was extremely comforting, like heaven in her hurricane.

"Sorry, Cloud. I...I don't know, I've always felt second to Aerith, in the back of my mind. You just seemed to like her so much, and just...I want you to care about me as much as you cared about her. I guess it's about time I told you that." Tifa's voice was fragile like antique china, and Cloud needed to step lightly as though not to shatter her into a thousand sharp, beautiful peices.

"Tifa." He began, giving the one hand he still held a light, affectionate squeeze without moving his eyes from their focus ahead. "You've known me almost your whole life. You know well by now how awkward and hard it is to discuss emotions and feelings, even more so after everything that's happened in my life...All the things I've felt and didn't get to feel, everyone I've lost."

Tifa saw images of people like his parents, Zack Fair, and Aerith run through her mind. She could depict Cloud's suffering easily, it was somehow like reading a page in a very complicated novel. A very sad, depressing and heavy novel. "...Keep going." She urged, wanting Cloud to speak his mind for what seemed like the first time in his life.

If I was a simple man,
And I could make you understand.
There'd be no reason to think twice;
You'd be my sun, you'd be my light.
If I was a simple man...
If I was a simple man...

"Well..I guess I could say you'll always be more important to me than anyone else, you've been here for me for a long time. I don't know why you'd ever feel second to Aerith. Even though she was certainly..." Cloud's words disappeared for several seconds, before he inhaled deeply and continued in his monotonous voice. "A beautiful person, and I loved her with all I ever had."

Tifa felt her heart sink a little, as much as it wracked her body with guilt for still being strangely green and jealous of her deaceased friend. She opened her mouth to speak, only to not hear her own voice when she tried to push the words out; instead she heard one that was much deeper and more introverted, the one belonging to her best friend and love interest, Cloud Strife. He was speaking again, and she happily listened, for is wasn't often she and him had talks that could be considered anywhere near sentimental. Usually all they ever seemed to do was argue and fight, something that really pained her to admit or think about.

"But, that doesn't mean I don't love you more."

Tifa felt her heart speed up, as the rain began to fade into mild drizzle in the now bright, early morning. As they walked the streets of Midgar, hand in hand, they saw the battered, tired souls of the extremely early workers and civillians beginning to roam the streets and prepare themselves for another difficult day, and this was a severe indication for the pair that it was time for them to be getting home. It had to be getting on five o'clock or five thirty; a time they had planned to be back in bed by. She ran Cloud's most recent sentance over in her mind, enjoying it and breathing it. A glance at the sky painted a beautiful picture as the sun struggled and fought to break through the clouds. It seemed to whisper to her that everything was at peace at that very second, and she believed this ominous, imaginary voice with bliss. "We should get home, Cloud. I don't want Marlene and Denzel to worry." She said rather abruptly.

Cloud nodded, turning around and beginning to walk in the opposite direction, towards home. Towards the things he lived for, strived for, felt for...The things that helped him bandage the scars of yesterday, helped him write the plans for tomorrow, and helped him enjoy the present; a time that was really like no other.

Silence persued them like a witty virus, and soon they found themselves walking, attatched at the hand still, but wordless. Seemingly breathless. However, Seventh Heaven soon began drifting into view, as if far off in the dim sky;  floating in the clouds with the dreams of the people who enjoyed being there. Upon seeing it, Tifa blew one final question into the morning air.

"So, Cloud...What were you actually going to say when I asked you that question? Like, after you thought about it, and after I jumped to those stupid conclusions." Tifa stopped walking so she could stare into the gentle yet broken face of the man she considered her hero.

Cloud swallowed, as he looked back at her. "Well...I just don't think, that if Aerith wasn't out of our lives, nothing would be like it is now. She would have stopped Sephiroth from destroying the planet, everything would have been better for a while...But what would have happened? We probably wouldn't have Marlene and Denzel, I probably wouldn't have needed a fresh start so badly...There would just be so many things that wouldn't seem right when I think about how..." Cloud seemed to force a smile, as much as it looked hard for him. "..How happy I am lately. I'm not saying I'm glad Aerith's..." His voice trailed for several more seconds, as if just to mention her death was a curse in itself; a burden larger than a boulder and exponentially more heavy. "I guess I'm just saying everything happens for a reason. There's nothing I can do about it. We'll always have regrets, but there's nothing we can do."

Sometimes I wonder why,
I'm so full of these endless rymes,
About the way I feel inside.
I wish...

Tifa felt as if she had taken fifty pounds or more off the load of stress she was forced to carry with her. Just hearing Cloud say that he was happy where he was, and seeing him smile regardless of it possibly being forced; it was all too breath taking. She felt like she had wings, light and uplifted by Cloud's kind confession of love and enjoyment in his life. It was enough to make her want to shout; although that was something she would not do at such an awkward hour. Instead, she wreathed her arms tightly around his body, somehow never feeling better.

"Cloud?"

"Yeah?"

"I told you earlier that I didn't really know where I was going to be tomorrow. Which, I think will always be true. Do you think that...wherever that is, you'll be there with me?"

Cloud's embrace around her body increased ever so slightly, another small form of affection, that somehow meant the world and more to the girl with the whip straight, dark hair. Cloud could sometimes be cold, and sometimes sweeter than any amount of candy. He could be confusing or confused, strong or in fact, very fragile and weak. But however the blonde with the double sided personality was acting and whatever vibes he sent to all those around him, he was a dependable person with a strong will to make things right in his life and the lives of others. That was all that mattered to Tifa. She felt perfect, as she stood there close to Seventh Heaven, embracing him, and never wanting the moment to end. It was all these things and so much more, that caused her to already know full and well, the answer Cloud would have to her final query.

"Yeah. Yeah, I will."

Sometimes...

Sometimes (I Wish) // End.